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Old 17th Oct 2004, 17:41   #11
Colyngbourne
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Given a link to this today - paste a snippet of your writing and this thingie will tell you if you (the writer) is male or female

Gender tester of author

I turned out to be mostly male :? Should I be worried? Or is it skill :? at writing in the male character?
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Old 17th Oct 2004, 18:27   #12
John Self
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It got me right, but the science seems distinctly dodgy. It does it all based on a few dozen 'keywords' each of which it defines as either male or female. So "the" and "a" are male, but "was" and "and" are female. According to the statistics, out of a quarter of a million samples, it has got it right 62% of the time and wrong 38% of the time - not very impressive really since it has a 50/50 chance if it just plucked a sex at random.
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Old 18th Oct 2004, 11:15   #13
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Unfortunately named authors - Excellent, thanks John, gave my shift a good chuckle.
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Old 18th Oct 2004, 11:25   #14
wshaw
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Quote:
Originally Posted by John Self
It got me right, but the science seems distinctly dodgy. It does it all based on a few dozen 'keywords' each of which it defines as either male or female. So "the" and "a" are male, but "was" and "and" are female. According to the statistics, out of a quarter of a million samples, it has got it right 62% of the time and wrong 38% of the time - not very impressive really since it has a 50/50 chance if it just plucked a sex at random.
Got me right too, for non-fiction and fiction. Which I was a little depressed about.

I would have thought that the 62/38% split is, as they say, statistically significant though...
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Old 18th Oct 2004, 11:36   #15
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I came out blokey which is okey (!) but you don't really need a couple of pseudo-boffins creating some gender guessing algorithm to tell. Especially as I put in that Last Train SF short. Female SF writers aren't exactly ten a penny, and the style of my thing does nothing to make someone think this is a woman writing.

That said, I know from personal experience (Sorry Lucoid, wherever you are, hope you've forgiven me! ) it's not always as easy as you think.
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Old 19th Oct 2004, 15:26   #16
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For cheap sub-Onion laughs you could do worse than The Portadown News, an NI version of the ubiquitous satirical online newspaper phenomenon.

Some items may be too parochial for widespread appreciation but a lot of the stuff (in the early sections of the archive particularly, when the stories were more than one-paragraph single jokes) could be about any small town across the country, with their chavs and creepies:

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Corcrain girl forgets to swear

13-year-old Corcrain resident Tanya Slapper remains in social limbo today after accidentally having an entire conversation without saying "fuck".

The incident occurred yesterday outside West End Video, while the youngster was discussing an article in popular teen mag "Just 17 Stone" with schoolfriends Jemma Frump (12), Kylie McFatt (14) and Leslie Minger (11). "We were looking at 'Position of the Fortnight'," explained Ms Frump to our reporter, "and Tanya goes 'I don't think I'd go for that, it's better if you can see his face when he comes'. Then she goes 'Anyway you don't have to do it every fortnight. My ma says that's just for tarts.'"

Stunned by this lack of profanity, Tanya's friends openly questioned her state of mind. "I goes, 'Who the fuck do you fucking think you are, you fucking stuck up fucking cow," explained Ms McFatt. "Think you're too fucking good for us, do you? Fuck you."
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More shit jobs on the way!

There was good news on the employment front yesterday as English DIY chain Widget Warehouse announced it will be opening a new superstore in Central Craigavon. The development will bring 120 useless minimum-wage jobs to the area, offering local teenagers the chance to earn £3.20 an hour with no benefits, security, prospects or job satisfaction.

"We're aiming for the sort of teenager who's already quit McDonalds but still needs a few weeks work to pay off his mobile phone bill," explained Widget Warehouse Personnel Director Ivana Himmler yesterday. "The work will involve standing about in small groups talking about sex while giving customers dirty looks. No previous experience is necessary."

Widget Warehouse is also encouraging applications from mentally-retarded adults, former paramilitary prisoners, and anyone who's really getting stick from the dole.
I also liked this piece from this week about Century Farm, a pisspoor local variant on The 1900 House, where a family has to live and work on a farm in 1904-stylee:

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This week: John is alarmed to learn that Japan has invaded Russia, Connor voices support for Theodore Roosevelt in the US Presidential Election, Fionnuala welcomes the invention of the electrifying diode, and Marie celebrates the birth of famous novelist Graham Greene, starting a causality paradox that threatens to unravel the fabric of space-time.
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Old 19th Oct 2004, 15:32   #17
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Quote:
Corcrain girl forgets to swear

13-year-old Corcrain resident Tanya Slapper remains in social limbo today after accidentally having an entire conversation without saying "fuck".

The incident occurred yesterday outside West End Video, while the youngster was discussing an article in popular teen mag "Just 17 Stone" with schoolfriends Jemma Frump (12), Kylie McFatt (14) and Leslie Minger (11). "We were looking at 'Position of the Fortnight'," explained Ms Frump to our reporter, "and Tanya goes 'I don't think I'd go for that, it's better if you can see his face when he comes'. Then she goes 'Anyway you don't have to do it every fortnight. My ma says that's just for tarts.'"

Stunned by this lack of profanity, Tanya's friends openly questioned her state of mind. "I goes, 'Who the fuck do you fucking think you are, you fucking stuck up fucking cow," explained Ms McFatt. "Think you're too fucking good for us, do you? Fuck you."
...which reminds me (inna Vicky Pollard stylee) that the brand new series of Little Britain is on BBC3 tonight.

Quote:
This week: John is alarmed to learn that Japan has invaded Russia, Connor voices support for Theodore Roosevelt in the US Presidential Election, Fionnuala welcomes the invention of the electrifying diode, and Marie celebrates the birth of famous novelist Graham Greene, starting a causality paradox that threatens to unravel the fabric of space-time.
I laughed out loud at that one, very good.
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Old 21st Oct 2004, 16:48   #18
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The BOfH archives, for old net-heads everywhere.
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Old 22nd Oct 2004, 11:21   #19
amner
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Some classic Rainbow. You'll need sound.
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Old 22nd Oct 2004, 13:37   #20
Colyngbourne
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Default Re: Rainbow

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Originally Posted by amner
Some classic Rainbow. You'll need sound.
Cunning, indeed :wink:
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