Noumenon
13th Jan 2008, 20:01
This is the prologue chapter of a book for young readers which I wrote a few years back now - er, just the prologue, not the whole book I'm afraid, although I have plotted it out in some detail. It was originally about 5000 words (this version is 3090) and the biggest problem identified was that the "style" and the "reading age" were ill matched, the language being considered too old for the audience - this may still be an issue.
The intention, if you will believe it, was to write "a political thriller for ages 5-8", think Zorro meets Robin Hood with talking mice and cheese instead of gold... I've not worked on it for about a year, but any opinions would be welcomed as I'm in dire need of getting back to writing regularly again. Note: one hyphen indicates a text break, three hyphens a page break. Now I'll shut up.Each and every night, Muss. Dorothy opened the book, looked around that the little faces staring back, then began to read. This is how it went:
- - -
A Nest Of My Own
- - -
Once upon a time, deep in the countryside, there lived a restless mouse. Everyday he had to stay in the nest and look after the baby mice while all the older mice went out to find food. He thought he was more than big enough to go outside too, but he wasn’t allowed. One day, just before everyone was about to eat what the older mice had found for them, he stood up and said, “I’m tired of not being allowed outside! I’m old enough to look for food with the others and it’s not fair that you won’t let me!” Everything went quiet.
The oldest and wisest mouse looked sternly at him. “The rules of the nest say young ones must learn and grow before they can go outside,” he said. “Without those rules the nest would be useless and we would be unprotected in the deep, dark countryside. The answer is still No.” At this the restless mouse grew so angry he squeaked – the other mice were shocked at his rudeness! “Your rules are wrong,” he squeaked, “I’m all grown up! If I built a nest of my own then I’d make the rules, and I’d make sure they knew when a mouse was old enough to go outside!” The old, wise mouse said, “If you think you are old enough to build a nest of your own, then maybe you should go and build one.”
The restless mouse suddenly felt scared. But he swallowed hard, puffed out his chest and squeaked “FINE!” before scampering away. All the others followed but before he could leave the wise mouse gave him a parcel made from a folded leaf, still on its twig so he could carry it on his shoulder. “Here are berries, nuts and seeds. They are safe to eat, so look for more like them as you go. Take care of the leaf and twig, they may be useful.”
The wise mouse looked sad. “There are more rules in the world outside than there are in the nest,” he said. “Maybe you will find what you seek. I hope it is the way home.” For a moment, the restless mouse felt a tiny doubt and wondered if he should stay. Be he was also excited, so he shouldered the parcel, climbed the tunnel to the surface and was gone.
-
Outside! The restless mouse was dazzled by all the plants and flowers, the shape of the ground, the curve of a stream and the towering trees. But most of all there was the sky, high and huge and not at all like the ceiling of the nest (which was much like its floor). He was so excited that for a while he forgot that he hadn’t had anything to eat or that the day was half over before he even left, but soon he became hungry. He opened the leaf and looked with dismay at the food within – not much! He ate a berry, chewed a seed, nibbled on a nut while he looked around at the growing shadows and the darkening sky.
It was getting late and the sky was… different. Instead of high and bright, it was low and dark and lumpy. He reached for another mouthful, but his little paw closed on nothing – all the food was gone! He’d eaten it all! He was still hungry, and couldn’t even remember what the berries, nuts and seeds looked like. Angrily he threw the leaf and twig away, because they were useless now he had no food to carry in them. The sky grew darker.
The restless mouse had come too far to turn back now, but there were so many things he hadn’t thought about before leaving the nest and the biggest was this: he didn’t know anything about the deep, dark countryside, and it was getting really dark! He didn’t know where to sleep, or what to eat, or what the grey lumpy things in the sky were called. He certainly didn’t know what the droplet of falling water was that landed on his nose – but he didn’t like it! Then came another, then more, until the air was filled with falling water.
He ran willy nilly trying to escape, but the water was everywhere at once. Now he wished he hadn’t thrown away the leaf, it would have at least provided some shelter. In the end he huddled beneath the roots of a tree, wet and miserable as night fell around him too. He felt more alone than ever before, even when the rain stopped there was no comfort. He listened to the strange sounds of the countryside, scared to move in case something came to find out what he was and if he tasted nice. He though he would never go to sleep again, bit it had been a long, tiring day and without meaning to he fell into a light, shivery sleep.
-
The restless mouse woke as soon as the sun rose and immediately turned around to face back towards the nest. He knew now that he wasn't ready for the deep, dark countryside no matter how grown up he thought he was. He didn't know what he would say when he got home, but that seemed less important than being there. He saw berries on the bushes beside the stream but couldn't remember if they were safe to eat. He felt embarrassed at the way he had behaved, but then he spotted a branch with a single leaf growing from it and he stopped. He decided he would replace the gift he had thrown away so carelessly.
He climbed into the bush up to the branch, slowly working his way along it towards the leaf at the end. The nearer he got, the more the branch bent towards the ground. He was almost at the twig, reaching for the leaf, the branch almost touching the grass below, when – CRACK! The branch snapped right in the middle and suddenly leaf, twig, branch and Mouse were all in the air. Up… and... then... down… SPLASH! He had landed in the stream! Swollen with the last night's rain, it flowed strong and fast, sweeping him away...
He didn't know how to swim and clung to the broken branch in terror as the stream took him further and further from home, first dunking him into a wider stream, which joined an even wider stream, which grew and grew until it was more like a river. He wondered what was going to happen to him, if he'd ever get home. Then up ahead the river grew so wide that it there were no banks on either side at all, just endless water for ever and ever.
The restless mouse was terrified. He kicked out, pushing the branch towards the bank as hard as he could, but the wide water up ahead got ever closer, wider, bluer. His strength was failing and he sagged against the branch in defeat, waiting for the water to take him away forever. He could barely keep his eyes open, but then he made out a greenish blur wading near the last sandy bank before the huge water. He heard a green-sounding voice say “ That’ll do nicely!” and “Just what I've been waiting for!” and then it said “Oh!”
He tried to call for help but a wave splashed into his mouth, he lost his grip on the branch and went under. And that would have been that, if it hadn't been for the bright green hand that fished him out of the sea moments later.
-
When he opened his eyes, the restless mouse was lying on small, uncomfortable pebbles - but wonderfully dry and solid pebbles all the same! His rescuer sat nearby, the broken branch resting on his knees. A tiny man, no more than a foot tall if stood up, he was green from his curly hair to his bare feet. He wore shorts the colour of grass and a waistcoat the shade of oak leaves, and when he grinned his teeth were like little square peas in a pod.
“Welcome back, little one!” said the strange little man with his green-sounding voice – if any sound could have a colour, this was the one. “You gave me a surprise, but all’s well now. And I have your stick safe and sound too.” He waved it cheerfully and the mouse wondered how the man could think it belonged to him, it being so much bigger than he.
“Thank you,” said the mouse. “I thought the biggest water would take me away forever.” He cast a nervous look at that great rolling blueness, but the green man looked at it with great affection. “Sometimes the sea takes away,” he said, “sometimes it brings right back, and when it chooses to, it can provide you everything you could ever need. That’s why I live here on the beach and that’s why I live so happy and well.” He laughed greenly and turned to look at the mouse again. “Do you have a name, little one?”
The mouse hesitated. This was before there were so many mice that they all needed different names to tell each other apart. When everybody knows everyone else already names just get in the way. But here was someone he didn’t know and who didn’t know him. The green man waited patiently. “I’m… Mouse,” said Mouse, although it was more like a question than an answer. The green man nodded solemnly, then smiled at him.
“Hello, Mouse,” he said. “I am the Diddy Dee.” Mouse didn’t know what to say to this, but the Diddy Dee got up and put the branch over his shoulder. “You’re hungry, I’ll bet,” he said. “Come on.” He started up the beach and Mouse hurried after him. They headed for a white cliff face so tall it made even trees seem dainty by comparison. The pebbles gave way to chalky sand and Mouse caught up just as the Diddy Dee stopped walking.
There was a crack in the cliff wide enough for the Diddy Dee to step through and Mouse followed – it reminded him of the tunnel leading to his nest and he felt tears spring up in his eyes, but he wiped them away so the Diddy Dee wouldn’t see. The crack opened out into a little cave and Mouse stopped in surprise. Ahead was a – well, just then he didn’t know what it was, but in time he learned it was a thing called a House. A house in a cave.
The Diddy Dee opened the door and showed him in. Everything was made of driftwood, even the walls. The furniture was made from all sorts of bits and bobs and odds and ends, no two the same but somehow matching perfectly. It was a place where everything fitted. “Have a seat,” said the Diddy Dee, “You must be tired.” He put the branch on a table and busied himself in a corner, returning with a plate of nuts and berries. Mouse climbed onto the plate he was so hungry and the Diddy Dee grinned as he watched him gobble it down.
When Mouse had finished eating the Diddy Dee turned to the branch. “Good bit of wood, this,” he said. “Nothing like it in the world for usefulness, if you ask me. Take my house. I’ve made it entirely out of the driftwood which the sea has brought my way. It’s taken a long time, but it’s nearly finished. See?” He went to a corner of the room and Mouse saw a gap in the wall where two pieces of wood didn’t quite meet. The Diddy Dee looked at the branch, then glanced at Mouse. “You’re lucky to have it, Mouse,” he said.
Mouse didn't need asking. "Please take it!" he cried, "You've been so kind to me! It's yours!" Without further ado the Diddy Dee slotted the branch into the wall and suddenly there was no gap any more - a perfect fit. The Diddy Dee smiled around at his finished house and Mouse felt just as happy to be able to repay the kindness he had been shown. Then a wave of tiredness rolled over him and Mouse yawned, his eyelids drooping. The last thing he saw was the Diddy Dee draping a raggedy blanket over him, then he slept.
-
Mouse woke the next morning feeling much better. Both the house and the cave were empty so he went looking for his host. He spotted the Diddy Dee rooting through a small pile of driftwood on the shore. The little man waved half a shoe he had found with a grin.
“Good morning, Mouse,” he said. “You’re looking much better! Let’s breakfast.” The Diddy Dee led the way back to the house and started laying the table, but Mouse stopped him. “Diddy Dee,” he said, “You’ve been too kind. I’d like to repay you properly, but I don’t know how.” Then Mouse poured out his whole story: the nest he left too soon, the hurtful things he said to everyone, his frightful night in the rain and how he fell in the stream and was washed away. The Diddy Dee listened patiently. At the end when Mouse said even his laughter sounded green he laughed out loud (and sounded as green as ever). Mouse sat back breathless and waited to hear what the Diddy Dee thought about it all.
“You’ve certainly had an adventure, Mouse,” said the Diddy Dee. “But what have you learned? What do you want to do?” Mouse thought hard. “I still want to build a nest of my own,” he said, “but I know I’m not ready yet. So I want to go home, so I can learn all the things I need to so I can build my nest later, when I’m really grown up.”
The Diddy Dee looked like he approved but he also shook his head. “That’s good Mouse, but I can’t take you back. This is my home and if I left what would be come of it? And the beach, who would collect all the driftwood and keep it tidy? And, what if someone else floated down the river and out to sea while I was gone? Who would be here to pull them out just in time?” Mouse didn’t know, so he could see the Diddy Dee must stay.
“Can you teach me, Diddy Dee?” asked Mouse. “If you teach me how to survive in the world, I could go home by myself and you could stay here and care for your house and the beach and other victims of the river. Can you?”
“That I can do,” said the Diddy Dee, “but you didn’t listen when the wise old mouse tried to teach you. How do I know you’ll pay attention to me?” Mouse jumped from his chair and ran to the Diddy Dee in a fluster. “Oh, I promise to listen!” he cried, “I promise! I’ll remember everything you say and I’ll do it all too! Please just say you will and I’ll never forget a word as long as I live!” There was a fluttery feeling in his stomach he was so nervous, but the Diddy Dee grinned his green grin.
“Okay, Mouse,” said the Diddy Dee. “I’ll teach you to survive in the world, and one day you’ll leave my beach and get to your home safe and sound.” For the first time that he could remember, maybe in his whole life, the once restless Mouse smiled.
-
To other creatures, the life of a mouse seems a short, fast one. Three years is a ripe old age amongst mice, but that isn't to say mice have it rough. You can fit an awful lot into just one year, let alone the other two. It was a whole year later that a strong and wily mouse descended the tunnel to face a nest preparing for the morning forage.
The wise mouse was pushing four whole years now, the oldest who had ever lived in the nest. At first no-one recognised this stranger, probably because he had done so much of his growing up away from home, but when he bowed low and spoke they knew him at once, because no matter how old anybody grows voices never really change.
"Wise father," said the stranger, "I am so sorry for what I said to you when I was a child. I wish that I had listened to what you had to teach me. I wish I had been here to help the nest when I was truly ready. Can you forgive me?" At this the wise old mouse stooped to help the stranger rise, as best as his old bones would let him.
"Can you forgive me?" asked the wise one. "I should not have let you leave, even if only for a day. We searched when you didn't return, and every day since it has not just been food we hoped to find outside our nest. But you have returned. Our home is complete again." All the mice crowded around to welcome him, but Mouse stopped them.
"I have not come to stay," Mouse said. "I left here to build a nest of my own and that is what I have done. I have returned to do one thing only: to bring you all with me, to live in a new home." That very day, everything in the nest was packaged up and the strong and wily Mouse led them all away, never to return. And do you know where he took them?
- - -
Of course, that isn't EXACTLY how it went. It went a bit more like this:
"I can't hear..."
"Who's "Willy Nilly"?"
"Muss. Dorothy, Paul won't leave me alone!" "No Muss. Dorothy, Lucy won't leave ME alone!"
"I still can't hear!"
"What's a "fluster"?"
"Stop it!"
"YOU stop it!"
And so on.
Nothing always goes the way you expect it to, but one thing always followed the question at the end of the story. When Muss. Dorothy asked "And do you know where he took them?", the youngsters ALWAYS shouted in delight –
- - -
Nestown
...which is the title of the first chapter.
The intention, if you will believe it, was to write "a political thriller for ages 5-8", think Zorro meets Robin Hood with talking mice and cheese instead of gold... I've not worked on it for about a year, but any opinions would be welcomed as I'm in dire need of getting back to writing regularly again. Note: one hyphen indicates a text break, three hyphens a page break. Now I'll shut up.Each and every night, Muss. Dorothy opened the book, looked around that the little faces staring back, then began to read. This is how it went:
- - -
A Nest Of My Own
- - -
Once upon a time, deep in the countryside, there lived a restless mouse. Everyday he had to stay in the nest and look after the baby mice while all the older mice went out to find food. He thought he was more than big enough to go outside too, but he wasn’t allowed. One day, just before everyone was about to eat what the older mice had found for them, he stood up and said, “I’m tired of not being allowed outside! I’m old enough to look for food with the others and it’s not fair that you won’t let me!” Everything went quiet.
The oldest and wisest mouse looked sternly at him. “The rules of the nest say young ones must learn and grow before they can go outside,” he said. “Without those rules the nest would be useless and we would be unprotected in the deep, dark countryside. The answer is still No.” At this the restless mouse grew so angry he squeaked – the other mice were shocked at his rudeness! “Your rules are wrong,” he squeaked, “I’m all grown up! If I built a nest of my own then I’d make the rules, and I’d make sure they knew when a mouse was old enough to go outside!” The old, wise mouse said, “If you think you are old enough to build a nest of your own, then maybe you should go and build one.”
The restless mouse suddenly felt scared. But he swallowed hard, puffed out his chest and squeaked “FINE!” before scampering away. All the others followed but before he could leave the wise mouse gave him a parcel made from a folded leaf, still on its twig so he could carry it on his shoulder. “Here are berries, nuts and seeds. They are safe to eat, so look for more like them as you go. Take care of the leaf and twig, they may be useful.”
The wise mouse looked sad. “There are more rules in the world outside than there are in the nest,” he said. “Maybe you will find what you seek. I hope it is the way home.” For a moment, the restless mouse felt a tiny doubt and wondered if he should stay. Be he was also excited, so he shouldered the parcel, climbed the tunnel to the surface and was gone.
-
Outside! The restless mouse was dazzled by all the plants and flowers, the shape of the ground, the curve of a stream and the towering trees. But most of all there was the sky, high and huge and not at all like the ceiling of the nest (which was much like its floor). He was so excited that for a while he forgot that he hadn’t had anything to eat or that the day was half over before he even left, but soon he became hungry. He opened the leaf and looked with dismay at the food within – not much! He ate a berry, chewed a seed, nibbled on a nut while he looked around at the growing shadows and the darkening sky.
It was getting late and the sky was… different. Instead of high and bright, it was low and dark and lumpy. He reached for another mouthful, but his little paw closed on nothing – all the food was gone! He’d eaten it all! He was still hungry, and couldn’t even remember what the berries, nuts and seeds looked like. Angrily he threw the leaf and twig away, because they were useless now he had no food to carry in them. The sky grew darker.
The restless mouse had come too far to turn back now, but there were so many things he hadn’t thought about before leaving the nest and the biggest was this: he didn’t know anything about the deep, dark countryside, and it was getting really dark! He didn’t know where to sleep, or what to eat, or what the grey lumpy things in the sky were called. He certainly didn’t know what the droplet of falling water was that landed on his nose – but he didn’t like it! Then came another, then more, until the air was filled with falling water.
He ran willy nilly trying to escape, but the water was everywhere at once. Now he wished he hadn’t thrown away the leaf, it would have at least provided some shelter. In the end he huddled beneath the roots of a tree, wet and miserable as night fell around him too. He felt more alone than ever before, even when the rain stopped there was no comfort. He listened to the strange sounds of the countryside, scared to move in case something came to find out what he was and if he tasted nice. He though he would never go to sleep again, bit it had been a long, tiring day and without meaning to he fell into a light, shivery sleep.
-
The restless mouse woke as soon as the sun rose and immediately turned around to face back towards the nest. He knew now that he wasn't ready for the deep, dark countryside no matter how grown up he thought he was. He didn't know what he would say when he got home, but that seemed less important than being there. He saw berries on the bushes beside the stream but couldn't remember if they were safe to eat. He felt embarrassed at the way he had behaved, but then he spotted a branch with a single leaf growing from it and he stopped. He decided he would replace the gift he had thrown away so carelessly.
He climbed into the bush up to the branch, slowly working his way along it towards the leaf at the end. The nearer he got, the more the branch bent towards the ground. He was almost at the twig, reaching for the leaf, the branch almost touching the grass below, when – CRACK! The branch snapped right in the middle and suddenly leaf, twig, branch and Mouse were all in the air. Up… and... then... down… SPLASH! He had landed in the stream! Swollen with the last night's rain, it flowed strong and fast, sweeping him away...
He didn't know how to swim and clung to the broken branch in terror as the stream took him further and further from home, first dunking him into a wider stream, which joined an even wider stream, which grew and grew until it was more like a river. He wondered what was going to happen to him, if he'd ever get home. Then up ahead the river grew so wide that it there were no banks on either side at all, just endless water for ever and ever.
The restless mouse was terrified. He kicked out, pushing the branch towards the bank as hard as he could, but the wide water up ahead got ever closer, wider, bluer. His strength was failing and he sagged against the branch in defeat, waiting for the water to take him away forever. He could barely keep his eyes open, but then he made out a greenish blur wading near the last sandy bank before the huge water. He heard a green-sounding voice say “ That’ll do nicely!” and “Just what I've been waiting for!” and then it said “Oh!”
He tried to call for help but a wave splashed into his mouth, he lost his grip on the branch and went under. And that would have been that, if it hadn't been for the bright green hand that fished him out of the sea moments later.
-
When he opened his eyes, the restless mouse was lying on small, uncomfortable pebbles - but wonderfully dry and solid pebbles all the same! His rescuer sat nearby, the broken branch resting on his knees. A tiny man, no more than a foot tall if stood up, he was green from his curly hair to his bare feet. He wore shorts the colour of grass and a waistcoat the shade of oak leaves, and when he grinned his teeth were like little square peas in a pod.
“Welcome back, little one!” said the strange little man with his green-sounding voice – if any sound could have a colour, this was the one. “You gave me a surprise, but all’s well now. And I have your stick safe and sound too.” He waved it cheerfully and the mouse wondered how the man could think it belonged to him, it being so much bigger than he.
“Thank you,” said the mouse. “I thought the biggest water would take me away forever.” He cast a nervous look at that great rolling blueness, but the green man looked at it with great affection. “Sometimes the sea takes away,” he said, “sometimes it brings right back, and when it chooses to, it can provide you everything you could ever need. That’s why I live here on the beach and that’s why I live so happy and well.” He laughed greenly and turned to look at the mouse again. “Do you have a name, little one?”
The mouse hesitated. This was before there were so many mice that they all needed different names to tell each other apart. When everybody knows everyone else already names just get in the way. But here was someone he didn’t know and who didn’t know him. The green man waited patiently. “I’m… Mouse,” said Mouse, although it was more like a question than an answer. The green man nodded solemnly, then smiled at him.
“Hello, Mouse,” he said. “I am the Diddy Dee.” Mouse didn’t know what to say to this, but the Diddy Dee got up and put the branch over his shoulder. “You’re hungry, I’ll bet,” he said. “Come on.” He started up the beach and Mouse hurried after him. They headed for a white cliff face so tall it made even trees seem dainty by comparison. The pebbles gave way to chalky sand and Mouse caught up just as the Diddy Dee stopped walking.
There was a crack in the cliff wide enough for the Diddy Dee to step through and Mouse followed – it reminded him of the tunnel leading to his nest and he felt tears spring up in his eyes, but he wiped them away so the Diddy Dee wouldn’t see. The crack opened out into a little cave and Mouse stopped in surprise. Ahead was a – well, just then he didn’t know what it was, but in time he learned it was a thing called a House. A house in a cave.
The Diddy Dee opened the door and showed him in. Everything was made of driftwood, even the walls. The furniture was made from all sorts of bits and bobs and odds and ends, no two the same but somehow matching perfectly. It was a place where everything fitted. “Have a seat,” said the Diddy Dee, “You must be tired.” He put the branch on a table and busied himself in a corner, returning with a plate of nuts and berries. Mouse climbed onto the plate he was so hungry and the Diddy Dee grinned as he watched him gobble it down.
When Mouse had finished eating the Diddy Dee turned to the branch. “Good bit of wood, this,” he said. “Nothing like it in the world for usefulness, if you ask me. Take my house. I’ve made it entirely out of the driftwood which the sea has brought my way. It’s taken a long time, but it’s nearly finished. See?” He went to a corner of the room and Mouse saw a gap in the wall where two pieces of wood didn’t quite meet. The Diddy Dee looked at the branch, then glanced at Mouse. “You’re lucky to have it, Mouse,” he said.
Mouse didn't need asking. "Please take it!" he cried, "You've been so kind to me! It's yours!" Without further ado the Diddy Dee slotted the branch into the wall and suddenly there was no gap any more - a perfect fit. The Diddy Dee smiled around at his finished house and Mouse felt just as happy to be able to repay the kindness he had been shown. Then a wave of tiredness rolled over him and Mouse yawned, his eyelids drooping. The last thing he saw was the Diddy Dee draping a raggedy blanket over him, then he slept.
-
Mouse woke the next morning feeling much better. Both the house and the cave were empty so he went looking for his host. He spotted the Diddy Dee rooting through a small pile of driftwood on the shore. The little man waved half a shoe he had found with a grin.
“Good morning, Mouse,” he said. “You’re looking much better! Let’s breakfast.” The Diddy Dee led the way back to the house and started laying the table, but Mouse stopped him. “Diddy Dee,” he said, “You’ve been too kind. I’d like to repay you properly, but I don’t know how.” Then Mouse poured out his whole story: the nest he left too soon, the hurtful things he said to everyone, his frightful night in the rain and how he fell in the stream and was washed away. The Diddy Dee listened patiently. At the end when Mouse said even his laughter sounded green he laughed out loud (and sounded as green as ever). Mouse sat back breathless and waited to hear what the Diddy Dee thought about it all.
“You’ve certainly had an adventure, Mouse,” said the Diddy Dee. “But what have you learned? What do you want to do?” Mouse thought hard. “I still want to build a nest of my own,” he said, “but I know I’m not ready yet. So I want to go home, so I can learn all the things I need to so I can build my nest later, when I’m really grown up.”
The Diddy Dee looked like he approved but he also shook his head. “That’s good Mouse, but I can’t take you back. This is my home and if I left what would be come of it? And the beach, who would collect all the driftwood and keep it tidy? And, what if someone else floated down the river and out to sea while I was gone? Who would be here to pull them out just in time?” Mouse didn’t know, so he could see the Diddy Dee must stay.
“Can you teach me, Diddy Dee?” asked Mouse. “If you teach me how to survive in the world, I could go home by myself and you could stay here and care for your house and the beach and other victims of the river. Can you?”
“That I can do,” said the Diddy Dee, “but you didn’t listen when the wise old mouse tried to teach you. How do I know you’ll pay attention to me?” Mouse jumped from his chair and ran to the Diddy Dee in a fluster. “Oh, I promise to listen!” he cried, “I promise! I’ll remember everything you say and I’ll do it all too! Please just say you will and I’ll never forget a word as long as I live!” There was a fluttery feeling in his stomach he was so nervous, but the Diddy Dee grinned his green grin.
“Okay, Mouse,” said the Diddy Dee. “I’ll teach you to survive in the world, and one day you’ll leave my beach and get to your home safe and sound.” For the first time that he could remember, maybe in his whole life, the once restless Mouse smiled.
-
To other creatures, the life of a mouse seems a short, fast one. Three years is a ripe old age amongst mice, but that isn't to say mice have it rough. You can fit an awful lot into just one year, let alone the other two. It was a whole year later that a strong and wily mouse descended the tunnel to face a nest preparing for the morning forage.
The wise mouse was pushing four whole years now, the oldest who had ever lived in the nest. At first no-one recognised this stranger, probably because he had done so much of his growing up away from home, but when he bowed low and spoke they knew him at once, because no matter how old anybody grows voices never really change.
"Wise father," said the stranger, "I am so sorry for what I said to you when I was a child. I wish that I had listened to what you had to teach me. I wish I had been here to help the nest when I was truly ready. Can you forgive me?" At this the wise old mouse stooped to help the stranger rise, as best as his old bones would let him.
"Can you forgive me?" asked the wise one. "I should not have let you leave, even if only for a day. We searched when you didn't return, and every day since it has not just been food we hoped to find outside our nest. But you have returned. Our home is complete again." All the mice crowded around to welcome him, but Mouse stopped them.
"I have not come to stay," Mouse said. "I left here to build a nest of my own and that is what I have done. I have returned to do one thing only: to bring you all with me, to live in a new home." That very day, everything in the nest was packaged up and the strong and wily Mouse led them all away, never to return. And do you know where he took them?
- - -
Of course, that isn't EXACTLY how it went. It went a bit more like this:
"I can't hear..."
"Who's "Willy Nilly"?"
"Muss. Dorothy, Paul won't leave me alone!" "No Muss. Dorothy, Lucy won't leave ME alone!"
"I still can't hear!"
"What's a "fluster"?"
"Stop it!"
"YOU stop it!"
And so on.
Nothing always goes the way you expect it to, but one thing always followed the question at the end of the story. When Muss. Dorothy asked "And do you know where he took them?", the youngsters ALWAYS shouted in delight –
- - -
Nestown
...which is the title of the first chapter.